Think Outside the TV box, Part II

Great article at Babble about TV or No TV for infants. There are the usual AAP recommendations. I think this piece about interactivity is right on.

"But the infant brain is unique in that it is not fully developed — it is particularly malleable, plastic, under the age of two. Early infant brains develop in response to stimuli from the environment. If their environment is a screen, their development will be different than it will be if a human can interact with them. If in the future you can talk to your screen and it can talk back, maybe what I'm saying will not apply. But we're not there. Babies need interaction with live, in-person human beings. There is more and more research that says exactly that."

Little Man and Boo are both learning from every person they come in contact with. We coo, we make faces, we giggle and laugh and kiss them. We model responses to their behavior. We use words and change what we are doing based on what they do. And it's not just mom and mom doing this. But when strangers say, "What a beautiful baby!" Little Man knows EXACTLY how to be coy and to dip his chin and make the stranger smile.

In fact, we are blessed with beautiful babies who prompt a ton of interaction. Sure, I'm biased. But I have noticed how often people stop to talk to Little Man and how often the nurses play with Boo versus other babies we encounter. All of that interaction helps them socialize and learn. TVs can't do that.

Finally, the concluding paragraph of the essay is right on:

I've come to the conclusion that television is neither enriching nor evil. It's reasonable to view as suspect the claim that a video can turn a kid into an "Einstein." But it's also reasonable to let your kid watch a little Sesame Street without flagellating yourself to death with a peer-reviewed journal article. Just let go of the guilt — either by letting go of the quest for parenting perfection, or by letting go of the remote.

And I've done this to a certain extent. While the TV might be on when we are with Little Man, he rarely is "watching" TV. Sometimes he's lying across my lap drinking milk while I am checking out the weather or catching up on Project Runway. Or sometimes hockey is on and Katie is watching, while I am sitting on the floor making dino noises at my son who is chewing his dino book and looking at me.

We haven't yet started plonking him down in front of the TV while we do something else. Instead, we plonk him down in his exersaucer or on the floor with a plastic basket of toys.

I've accepted my lack of parenting perfection AND I've also really stopped to analyze how much TV he actually watches and realized we have let go of the remote. He encounters some, but it's like contact TV, not primary encounter TV.

Think Outside the TV box

I grew up in a house where the TV was on a lot. I mean, hours at a time. In fact, when I was a kid, we were the first house on the block and among my friends to get cable. This didn't negate the fact that I come from a family of major readers. Both parents and my brother read incessantly and I probably read way more than the average bear, about a book a week or so (in a world of people who, on average, do not read a book a year).

But when I started thinking about trying to conceive, I swore there would be no TV for my little junior. Once Little Man and Boo were born, things went haywire and that good intention is now gone. Who knew I would spend literal hours at a time pumping breastmilk and sitting holding a very slow eating baby on a boppy. Also, I wasn't the only one feeding Little Man. Katie is a big fan of watching sports on TV so she would hold him with the TV on.

This was not a problem initially and I didn't feel too guilty. Little Man couldn't focus very far. But now? NOW he can see the TV and, boy, is he interested and, boy, do I feel guilty about him seeing it at all because of a possibleconnection between early TV viewing and ADD/ADHD, (though as the link to the google search will show you, it's open to debate whether or not there is a link to early TV viewing and ADHD).

As a matter of fact, this morning, after his breakfast and play time and cuddling time and swing time, I just needed to get dressed so I plopped him on the couch surrounded by toys (frankly, perhaps all the shiny toys that giggle, wiggle and squiggle may be the ADHD catalyst). Normally he will entertain himself in such a fashion just long enough for me to pull on tights, a skirt and a turtleneck, but not long enough for me to also brush my hair and teeth. Today he was mysteriously more content. Apparently the TV was still on to the weather report.

Damn. I'm that mom. Watch out or I will be putting diet coke in his bottle (though I am tempted to put bourbon on his owie-teething gums).

Related to regular TV, Little Man also has access to dog TV. We take Little Man and his canine companion in the car together with some regularity. This past sunday on the way to go hiking, Little Man was giggling up a storm.

"What's he laughing at?"

I glance back and he's watching Roman the dog bounce around the way back of our SUV. With each turn or jostle, Roman would slide or skid and Little Man would giggle like mad. We decided that Dog TV might be the most entertaining thing ever. Maybe I am not warping him too badly after all.

It's Official

I am that mom.

It's official. Expect me to begin to make cupcakes for school birthdays and harass teachers at Back to School Night. Look for portraits of my family in color-coordinated outfits.

How do I know I've gone over the edge?

I just wrote the Dreaded Holiday Letter and I'm working on holiday cards right now.

In my defense, I never sent birth announcements, so this letter is serving as that... an update for people about the state of my family and a picture of Little Man and Soybean to boot.

Does that make it less lame?